18Apr'11
11.13pm

black colour is soooo ugly.
but this stupid blog doesnt allow me to have spacing in my posts.
they go jumble and all cramped up with no spacing for my whole post just now):
eventually i gave up the colour part in order to keeep the spacings. ):

okay now, got to go sleeeep.
goodnight!


i know i failed to sleep within 15mins.
):

stupid blog's fault.
not i did on purpose! :x




and haix.
even if i wanted to stay in contact for a LITTLE while longer also cannot ):
cause ur gone.
by the time i reply.
):



haix. ))))))))))))))))):

18Apr'11
10.25pm

okay ive only got 15mins to update here hahaha.
im sick and im suppose to be in bed by 15 mins. HEHEHE.
as promised to someone :p

okay wow i really never update for very long already! that time i was still stuck in the stupid miserable place. :x

now~ ive left it for awhile now, and ive even went on a trip to taiwan with mummmy! (:
and im back already with all the little things for me to remember taiwan with.
and lots of pictures!

due to lack of time i dun think im going to upload any photos today hahaha.
actually my main purpose of coming to blog today isnt because i want to update recent things or anything like that.

i just think i need some place to let my inner feelings out.
like to complain.
like to just say out how i feeel.


i hate the separation.
i hate having to console myself at so many times that everything's gonna be okay.
i hate having to imagine things and you all the time.
i hate the word 'lights out'.

i hate hearing 'the number you have dialed is currently unavailable, please try again later.'
and let me repeat, i hate that lady's voice when i call you. ):

haha.
im starting to get used to it.
since nov11 last year, we started to get separated.
but its not like we did spend alot of time together before that.
we had little time too.

and now, its apr18 now.. so many months have past.
and so many things have taken place.
we even went through the MSTD period.
6 weeks.

and these whole period of time.
ive already been hurt.
by many things. ):


my love has always come, without considering about myself.
i will give everything because its you.
because i think i wanna be nice to you.

but when i think of myself sometimes, i feeeel that im actually quite upset.
in actual fact,
im not happy.

but its funny how love comes to me.
cause the feeeling of me wanting to give and believing that being nice is the only thing i should care about and do....,

it always make me forget here and then that im not happy on my side.

hahaha.
yeah.
amazing huh.
i think it is, cause i dun think alot of people does this anymore.

because this is like putting people before self already.
not trying to boast or anything,
but i guess thats one of the best things i can give to my partner.
unconditional love.


however im human too, so yeah.
it happens when my heart raise a riot inside me and tell me 'what about yourself?'
i still am trying to believe the love stories i've grown up watching and believing in, and looking forward to. i hope my belief wont die.

because thats one of the beautiful things i still believe in.
and thats what im giving.
i'll be very heartbroken if i realise its NOT possible for it to happen to me.
or that its NOT gonna happen to me.


i hope not. ):
okay so lastly,
im just trying to get a job i'll be happy with currently.
resting while looking.

and im gonna go sleep,
hoping i can breathe through my nose again sooon.
haha.


goodnight (:

your love gives me wings.

simple.
loving.
cheerful. (:

to wait for the day when i will give you everything in this world.