30march'09

8:44am
[edited]


yesterday was 4th month......(:



















hmmm i woke up late today to do the IS module enrolment.

luckily still got the choice we made backup.

me, eliz and aisyah gotta get into the same IS class.

or its T.T



cause i dun have any classes of other modules with them.











hmmm i met siyu that day in johor!
in citysquare :D

was so happy!
been wanting to see her since she left NP.
left me):

hehe.
so we chitchatted for quite awhile.
and we took a pic! :D

all the best to you in life siyu!
i know ur one tough girl! :D
fish fish fish~
=P






and sat i went swimming with deardear.
at toa payoh there.
so many kids.
its infested.
LOL.

but i managed to swim 3laps lahs.
:x
hehe.
very little i know.

but yeah quite fun :D

















tml im going genting early early in the morning.

abt 6+am go over johor to take bus.





(:

hahahas.

im going with my mother and our penang relatives.



i can foresee what im gonna do there already.
cause its like the routine i have whenever im there.

walk around and window shop.

go play arcade alone.

(i'll play myself crazy)



and eat, eat and eat.

-.-











oh wells.

at least its still an overseas trip before i start school.

and NO HOPE ALREADY.
too late alreadyy.



silly me.

keep thinking still possible and stuff.

sad. T.T







this time round,

starting from apr20th,

its chiong all the way o.o



STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSness.



no more holidays till i gradddddddddddddddddd.



=/

























[deleted]















(:

(:

xoxo

26march'09
1.38am




):

):

):

):

):




why is everything going wrong!!!!

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.



):



stupid genting trip.
so much for talking so much.

in the end also i go alone.

not blaming anyone.
but its just...
timing's not right and nobody can go!!!!




ARHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

fuck):





and everything else.

everything's going wrong.



i dun like this.

i hate this.





):








i dun care if im being called a crybaby now.

but i just cant stop crying.

im so frustrated right now!!!!!!!!!!!

everythings going wronggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg!!!!






fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk.
):

25march'09
5.07pm

helloooos.

im in clubhouse.
waiting for old main comm to continue meeting.
so i get to use prisy's com for awhile.
:D



came to blog cause i received complains that i havent been updating.
HAHAHA.





hmmmm.

i love my new earrings =P



hehe.. =P



and i love the feeling of having new clothes in my closet.
hehe.





emm.
and i just made a decision concerning abt one whole year of my life.

i wonder if that decision is right.



and i suppose im gonna be very very busy.

wonder how it'll be like.
haha.



dear said something right.
anything is possible, as long as i think its worth it.



so yeah ive decided to do it for my sake.
make my life more worthwhile than rotting it away or wasting it.
(:






hmmm.
seems like alot of things are starting to happen in my life.

ive grown up.

i have my responsibilities.

im no longer a kid who can run away from them...


=/

and problem is i dun like to be restrained by responsibilities.

haha.




no choice(:


i will adapt de.














going genting from 31st march to 2nd april.

got a bigger room than usual..
but sian....
LOL.
sigh.....









hmmm.
so my life is gonna consists of 6 big catergories.

and i WILL be able to take care of all these.
6 is just a single number.
right?
(:












oh yah.
didnt say abt my results huh..?
lol.

i failed my MA1.
and im gonna repeat.

hopefully i get to upload module so i can still grad within 3years.
):




*praysss*








I WANT MONEY.
MONEY MONEY MONEY.
LOL.




okays im very random lol.











hmmm.
i would like to thank alot of ppl for being nice to me.
and have been there for me.
esp.

DEARDEAR.

EUGENE.

RYAN.

AISYAH.

ELIZABETH.

CHIENWEN.

FARAH.

PRISY.

AH LING - FA CHANG!

and alot more.
note** it is not in any order. LOL.




so dun jealous. haha.


=P



im going to find food now.
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
haha.







misses (: xoxo

11March'09
5.33pm

helloooos people. (:

am currently in malaysia,penang.
using my cousin's com to come online.
hehe.

not gonna be contactable for a period of time.
maybe two weeks.
maybe longer.



not gonna be able to come online very often either.
cause i dun have a com and a connection.
and i'll be moving all around.




i wonder if anybody would miss me.
hahas.











first day here and theres nth much to do.
and its raining.
so its super cold.



gonna get a new hairstyle soon.
hmmmm.

hopefully it turns out nice.
(:







and i think ive gained so much weight!!
im so fat now.
my god.
freaking fat.
):












hmmm.
and i guess things doesnt work and happen the same way for everybody.


people in this world dont share the same sentimentals with each other.
they dun think the same.
they dun feel the same.

and we shouldnt get so upset and affected by it.
right?
=/






but i guess its easier said than done.












and hey people.
how would u define love?
(:

very interested :P
do tell me! :P










these few days had been looking at myself.
not really on the physical side.
more on the inside.

i kinda dislike the chewyan now.

i used to think i shouldnt be influenced by the environment.
i should stay as who i am for the rest of my life.
a person who would treat everyone nice.
a person who treats everyone equal.


but i guess i changed.
the change had turned me into someone who i dun really like.

im already been affected by the environment.

i lost my patience.
i lost my cool when things happen.
i lost my cheerfulness.

im no longer optimistic.

i think ive become kinda irritating.
or annoying.
or something.



i lost some friends.
maybe thats proof.


i believe all this change had happened cause of things that came and went off in my life.

and esp because of how i handled them.


the way i handled them.
the thinking i have handling them.
and how the things developed in the end.
they caused my change.






i dun know if this change is good for me or bad.
like in the long run or something.

but i feel like ive lost the good old chewyan in me.
and i dun like that.



does anyone feel the same way as i do?
















call it thinking too much.
but i think sometimes everyone should sit down and think.

think about how have you handled stuff,
minor to major recently.

were you nice?
did you hurt anyone?
did you lose yourself to get something you want?
was the thing you wanted really what you want?
how would you feel if you're in that person's shoes?
things like that. etc.






and ive come to realise a few things:

LOVE is when all you need is his/her smile.

LOVE is when you care for him/her more than you care for yourself.











there're a few things i still believe in,
but had been weakened by others' thoughts, :

when you love someone, everything you do, a smile, the tone you speak, the efforts put in and every other thing is all natural. is straight from the heart.
(but everybody has a different standard, and doesnt have the same 'basics'.)

you should always sit down and think about stuff. whether its going right or wrong. and etc. and if you think abt it, it just means its impt to you.
(you're thinking too much and finding trouble for yourself.)


a few more things.
but i cant really remember what are they.
all random thoughts that i think is worth the thinking in life.



















anyways.
apart from all my thoughts,
i just wanna say,

take care everyone in spore!

esp you dear.
get well soon....
sorry i disturbed you from resting.






byebye.

2March'09

12:18am



hellooooss!

:D





its holidays!! x)









hmmm.

had been feeling really happy for the past few days.

since i finished my fmgt paper.





like so relieved.

hahahahhas.



no homework,

no project,

no exams,

no studying.







one more thing,

supposingly no need go school.

but then need to go school for cca.

everyday 9.30am - dun know what time. (earliest 5 or 6pm.)







cause concert's coming.

its on this coming sat,

march 7th!



in school at LT26.

(:



interested?

please come ask me for tickets.(:















anyways.

just helping out in everywhere i can.



kinda lucky im not performing :P

cause no need to go buy costumes. :P













learnt to make this nice bookmarks thingy from bending metals.

from hweeting!(:



decided to buy my own and give it a try.

and i made my first bookmark for deardear(:







was excited when i was making it,

thought he'll be happpyyyy with a gift the next day when we meet.

on sunday.





but he just thinks he can make a nicer one.

say next time teach me make.

puff.













lol.

humph.



















hmmm.

and we went out on sunday.

one whole day :D









MAC BIG BREAKFAST!

(:



not like i get to eat it very often.

cause i always wake up late :X







den we went sim lim,
to buy laptop charger.
hahahas.
his spoilt.
:X





den go minds cafe!(:

but when we reached,
it was wayyy early.
it onli starts at 2pm on weekends.
so we went over the other side,
to this ulu ulu looking shopping centre.


we looked at books at the small book fair,
dear found a book related to his studies.
$18.
lol. o.o



den we went arcade!
:D

played timecrisis.
daytona. (i won! :P)
the red green blue buttons game. (on ave, i win too :P)
and puzzle fighter -.-
deardear act pig eat tiger.
LOL.




den had a go at the stuff toy machinee.
):
i want the orange cushion with lumpy on top ):



but i didnt wanna spend like alot of money on something i dun know if i'll get,
so gave up after $2.
LOL.

):
i want.






den we went back over.
yays.
minds cafe.




cheesy fish&chips.
black and white brownie.
(:
memories.




we ordered those 2 again :P
and alot of other stuff.
like twin towers icecream.
chicken cutlet.
mushroom soup.
and salad(:

and coke and lemon tea.
:P



this time we played this treasure hunt game,
i dun like.
boring~~~

den balloon cup:D
the game we first played! :D
but deardear thrashed me.
humph.


hahahahas.



and we played this fishing game.
hahahahas.
sparkle in ur eyes deardear. :P



i lost too -.-


and den lastly was the sleeping queens card game.
the card deck superrrr cute lorrrr.
the picture cards :P


soon 2hrs ended ):

and it was time to go.





it was raining,
so ran over in the rain to the bus-stop for bus home to deardear's place.


accompanied him get things to go camp and came back to woodlands.(:











another thing is,
i read this book 'who moved my cheese?'
i know,
its already a super old book.

LOL.
but i just read it.

i like this phrase 'imagining you tasting the new cheese leads you to it.'

its sort of like,
believe and dream of what you really want,
and it will come to you one day if you work really hard:D




and i think im more like a haw.
at many times,
when things happens,
i always complain and say its unfair.


and i wont allow myself to stay long in that condition,
soon i'll think of ways to move on with my cheese.
but i get easily drawn back to stay behind with my good friend in cheeseless station c.
cause of fear.



true enough.
im always afraid of alot of things.
:X



physically,
mentally.




its sort of like,
i shouldnt think so much and be worried for nth sometimes.

and to face up to problems and handle them instead of hiding in the shade,
pretending not to see?






hmmm.
wouldnt say its a GREAT book.
but not bad(:








lastly,
i wanna say to prisy and farah.
I LOVE THE BOTH OF YOU!
hahhahaas.

the two of you are part of the reason why i go to SCC.
(:









and this song,
heard it from my beloved cousin, shing.

Plain White T - 1234

1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4

Give me more lovin' than I've ever had
Make it all better when I'm feelin' sad
Tell me that I'm special even when I know I'm not
Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Barely gettin' mad,
I'm so glad I found you
I love bein' around you

You make it easy,
it's as easy as 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4
There's only one thing
to do
Three words
for you
I love you

There's only one way
to say
Those three words
and that's what I'll do,
I love you

Give me more lovin' from the very start
Piece me back together when I fall apart
Tell me things you never even tell your closest friends
Make me feel good when I hurt so bad
Best that I've had,
I'm so glad that I found you
I love bein' around you

You make it easy,
it's as easy as 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4
There's only one thing
to do
Three words
for you
I love you

There's only one way
to say
Those three words
and that's what I'll do,
I love you
I love you

You make it easy,
it's easy as 1, 2, 1, 2, 3, 4
There's only one thing
to do
Three words
for you
I love you

There's only one way
to say
Those three words
and that's what I'll do,
I love you
I love you


1, 2, 3, 4
I love you
I love you(:






although its like repeating,
but its really super nice!!
and sweet :P

yawns.
its already 1am.
tml still have to go scc.
puff.



goodnight everyone :D!

your love gives me wings.

simple.
loving.
cheerful. (:

to wait for the day when i will give you everything in this world.