welcome to chewyan's world(:

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

18May'10
12:14am

happy birthday.
(:

hey guys.
how have u guys been?

im stuck in the cycle of going to work everyday.
and going out roaming the streets either with friends or alone nowadays.

alone most of the time.

like i need some peace.
lol.

no offence to my friends.
(:

for the one last time,
im going to make it clear.
even if you didnt or couldnt listen to me just now,
here's a repeat.

its true that ive been treating u from my heartfelt feelings.
you should know that.

i didnt know how to handle quarrels, fights or arguments,
and i turned to lies to cover up.

i admit.
im wrong.
and im sorry.
I AM SORRY.

i learnt from then on.
now i would rather be blunt more and say out the truth.
now i would always think of the bad scenarios when im cheering someone on with a positive promise. (so that i wont break a promise if the overly impossible comes into the picture)

i loved you.
thats a fact that we cant change.

and the reason why i feel that you dun love me enough is,
the distance that you have set between you and me.
your doubt of 'forever' with me.
your loss of trust in me.

all these created a distance between us.
i dont know if u noticed that.

worst thing was.
i ALWAYS thought it was due to me not being beautiful or pretty or slim or sexy or hot or girlish or something,
that makes you dun have the urge to love me.

i thought it was because u got used to the "bullying" of your ex gf that you dun talk much or share much anymore.

and overtime i lost the power to continue loving you unconditionally.
i started to think abt myself.

BECAUSE OF THE MISUNDERSTANDINGS.

till today,
we couldnt solve em.

and our relationship has become more and more complex.

bad to worst.

no more happy good times.
):

its true that i have no motives.
its true that i didnt go on to pick a fight or quarrel with you just now.
YOU KNOW I HATE THAT. ):

its true that all i wanted was to pass you the presents that i WANTED to buy for you for your special day and hoping that you'll like them. ):

im tired and cant stay awake now.
will continue tomorrow or something.....

your smell.
your skin.
your voice.
your lips.
your shoulders.
your hands.
your touch.

and your hug.

its all im gonna dream abt tonight in my dreams.
im sure.
):

but it can all ONLY be a dream and part of my memories...............

night night.
sweeeet dreams.

and once again.
happy birthday. (:

Y8:56 AM